One Month

It's been one month since what was one of the most emotional days of my life. One month since my faith in my fellow countrypeople, my faith in what is right and good, was totally shattered into a million pieces.

The morning after, my bestfriend from England facetimed me. I had been crying, so I composed myself before answering. As soon as I saw him, holding his puppy, with his husband standing behind him, looking grim, I burst into tears. They started crying. They don't even live here. But talking to them helped. I was inundated  with texts all day, all saying the same thing: what the fuck? People I hadn't talked to in a while texted me. That evening, my friend came over, we opened a bottle of wine, we cried. We went out to eat, and you could hear snippets of conversation around us: "Hillary."

I struggled. I couldn't go very long without bursting into tears the first few days after the election. Fear had overtaken. Fear of the unknown. Fear of what will happen to immigrants. Fear of what will happen to so many of my friends who are gay. Fear of what will happen to my rights as a woman. Fear of what will happen because I supported Hillary. I realized the last time I had felt like that was on September 11. And I thought "I survived."

Then, something snapped in me. What good would wallowing do? None.

So I've been concentrating on self care.

I haven't turned on the national news in one month. I haven't watched the Today Show in one month. I've read headlines, and made a choice whether or not to read the article. If I am watching something and DT comes on, I change the channel. I started going back to acupuncture. I started giving more reiki. I poured myself glasses of wine, just one, maybe 2, not a lot. When I was in the check out line at Target, I looked for People magazine to turn around- and I smiled when I saw someone had already done it. I started spending more time with friends and family.

And although my fear is still there, it no longer consumes me.

I'm keeping myself informed, feeling horror with each person he nominates to his cabinet. I sign petitions, I look into what groups I can join when I'm ready to join in the fight. Right now I'm not ready. I know I will be. But I need to heal before I can move on and fight. And I know I am luckier than most. I'm a white female. 2nd on the rung. I live in Massachusetts. The only state in the Union where every single county voted for Hillary. Where we have a state run health care system. Where we have State Police who have openly said they will not support deportation. Where women's health care centers are aplenty. Where we were the first state to legalize same-sex marriage. I'm in a bubble, but I thank God I am. Because even in this bubble, there is hate. There was antisemitic graffiti just a couple of miles away from my house. My house was "egged" (with paint balls) because I had a Clinton sign. But I know compared to what is going on in other states, that is all tame.

I said to my therapist 2 days after the election- it feels like either someone died, or I was going to marry this great guy, and the day before the wedding, I was told "no, sorry, you can't marry him, you have to marry his disgusting, misogynistic, racist, abusive older brother and you have no choice." So here I am. Complacent for now, but planning on how the hell to get out of this and survive without too many bruises.

And the fact that Hillary's popular vote margin keeps getting wider gives me hope. It gives me hope that this country that ripped me open and tore out my heart really isn't as evil as I thought. And maybe, just maybe, we can get through this. Because, after all, we are Stronger Together.

the day after.

I am broken.
I am devastated.

And I cannot stop crying.

Overwhelmed

I feel like I can't keep up with this election. My podcast list is overflowing with new political podcasts, the internet is bursting with new articles, and the breaking news on tv seems non-stop. So the blog seems nearly impossible to keep up with all that is going on.

Several women have now come forward to say they were sexually assaulted/harassed by Donald Trump. His response? LIES ALL LIES. Apparently only women who were sexually assaulted/harassed by Bill Clinton could possibly be telling the truth. Trump claimed he had evidence to prove this women were lying. His evidence? There is none.

Today my friend Anna sent me a text with a link to this article: Donald Trump Calls for Drug Test Ahead of Next Debate. Quite frankly you don't have to read the article to get where he is going with this. He thinks that Hillary has been "getting pumped up" with performance enhancing drugs before the debates. I burst into laughter when I read this. My response to my friend's text was simply "Un. Hinged." My favorite response to this outrageous claim?

If there is some performance enhancing drug that gives you decades of commanding policy experience I too would like a hit

— Andy Cobb (@AndyCobb) October 15, 2016

 100%. Give me some of that shit, too.

I can't even get into the mess that is his Twitter account.
Time Magazine really summed up the past week very eloquently:

 Total Meltdown.
There really is no other phrase for it.

Meanwhile, I somehow missed this powerful article in the NY Times last Sunday: Shakespeare Explains the 2016 Election.   The whole article discusses Richard III, and why Shakespeare sat down to write a play that discussed the question "How could a great country wind up being governed by a sociopath?" The last line in the article is what gave me the most pause: "Do not think it cannot happen, and do not stay silent or waste your vote."  Do not think it cannot happen. As Brexit taught us, ladies and gentlemen, the unthinkable can happen.

Can we please all work together to make sure it does not?

Comic relief:

No, I won't give up, no I won't give in, till I reach the end, I'm gonna try! 💥💪 #cobeetryeverything #gocobeego @puppystagrams @petsvideo @corgistagram @babyanimalstagram

A video posted by Cobee The Corgi (@cobeethecorgi) on Oct 5, 2016 at 8:13am PDT

You Can Do Anything

When the Trump Tape was released on Friday evening, I sat and watched it, my eyes popping out of their sockets.  His use of the word "pussy" is not what bothered me. It was when he said "And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything."  This is proof of the rape culture we live in. If indeed this is "locker room banter" THAT IS EXACTLY THE PROBLEM! This shouldn't be, and cannot be how men talk about women. Trump's excuse that it is "locker room banter" just makes me even matter. This is NOT how men should be talking about women, anywhere! Every single man I know has said he has never heard anyone talk like that in a locker room. Every single man I am close to also loathes Donald Trump and thinks he is a pig. Because I refuse to surround myself with men who treat women like that.  While I am lucky and would easily tell off a man who ever spoke to me in such a demeaning manner (thanks to 3 brothers who taught me not to take shit from anyone), I know most women would just take it.  I have a friend who spent the day on Saturday crying because watching that video brought up a lot of repressed emotion in regards to men's behavior towards her.  We need to start showing our boys that it is not ok to talk like this about women ANYWHERE.
I keep wondering who is supporting this guy? Then I saw this video. And it all became so, so clear.

Some of my favorite articles from the weekend:

Boston Globe:  
The misogynist in full

NY Times:
Donald Goes to the Dogs


Some of my favorite tweets:

After the tape was released:

All I'm saying is if Billy Bush deleted his Twitter maybe Trump really is making America great again.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) October 7, 2016

Well he's not always wrong. https://t.co/DvgXtxj6Dv

— Lawrence O'Donnell (@Lawrence) October 8, 2016

I feel like many men think women go everywhere in pairs because we like to talk a lot.

That's not why.

— Laura Silverman (@LJSilverman1) October 8, 2016

During the debate (and just before with his publicity stunt):

This is all starting to feel like the finale on a reality TV show.

— Matt Viser (@mviser) October 9, 2016

1998: "Paula Jones is a loser. But the fact is, she may be responsible for bringing down a president indirectly." pic.twitter.com/VOSQo2bYAX

— Lauren Werner (@LaurenWern) October 8, 2016

Exclusive video of Donald Trump backstage at the debate: pic.twitter.com/AqGaqzfeFR

— Angelo Carusone (@GoAngelo) October 10, 2016

#DonaldTrump clearly did his #debate prep tonight... on the comment threads of YouTube.

— Karl Frisch (@KarlFrisch) October 10, 2016

I'm a Muslim, and I would like to report a crazy man threatening a woman on a stage in Missouri. #debate

— Moustafa Bayoumi (@BayoumiMoustafa) October 10, 2016

watching this as a woman is so emotionally difficult because we've all been belittled like this by a male moron and had to take it #debate

— Claire Fallon (@ClaireEFallon) October 10, 2016

At times, I don't now if I'm watching Alec Baldwin or Donald Trump at this #debate

— igorvolsky (@igorvolsky) October 10, 2016

Meet Mike Pence

From Planned Parenthood:

Attention: WOMEN

How could any woman vote for him? Seriously. If you respect yourself, or respect  any woman, you cannot, cannot vote for this man.

Trump Supporters

I was at a family event this weekend when, inevitably the election came up. The group I was sitting with were all anti trump (I can't say for sure they were all pro-Hillary, but definitely all anti-Trump). I quickly looked around, knowing that there were people at the party who are pro-Trump. I quickly shushed the group, quietly letting them know that there were Trump supporters lurking around. Quite frankly, I did not want to get into some big, heated debate at my father's 70th birthday party. (My father, for the record, a life-long un-enrolled party voter, loathes Trump).  I eventually got up because the subject of Trump gets me all riled up, and by the time I came back into the room, the subject had changed. A friend of mine shared this article stating 7 things you know about a person when they say they are a Trump supporter, from the Daily Kos with me. I don't think that EVERY Trump supporter has every single one of these traits, but they certainly have at least one or two. And I am sure some have all (the Trump supporter at the party definitely is not all of them).


Here's a little something for all of you who think Gary Johnson is a serious candidate (spoiler alert: he's not):

Braggadocious

This is everything.

NY Times Endorsement

The New York Times has endorsed Hillary Clinton for President. And everyone should read it. Please take the time to do so here.

Some of my favorite parts:

• "...Mrs. Clinton’s occasional missteps, combined with attacks on her trustworthiness, have distorted perceptions of her character. She is one of the most tenacious politicians of her generation, whose willingness to study and correct course is rare in an age of unyielding partisanship. As first lady, she rebounded from professional setbacks and personal trials with astounding resilience. Over eight years in the Senate and four as secretary of state, she built a reputation for grit and bipartisan collaboration. She displayed a command of policy and diplomatic nuance and an ability to listen to constituents and colleagues that are all too exceptional in Washington."

This has driven me insane, how a lot of people cannot get beyond the fact that she has lied and is "untrustworthy."  She has made mistakes. She isn't perfect. No one is perfect. But somehow the mistakes she made has completely overshadowed all of the amazing things she has done (may of which are outlined in the op-ed).

• "Mrs. Clinton has shown herself to be a realist who believes America cannot simply withdraw behind oceans and walls, but must engage confidently in the world to protect its interests and be true to its values, which include helping others escape poverty and oppression."

YES! Believing we can just build walls and isolate ourselves as a country and continue to be "great" is ludicrous.

• Through war and recession, Americans born since 9/11 have had to grow up fast, and they deserve a grown-up president. A lifetime’s commitment to solving problems in the real world qualifies Hillary Clinton for this job, and the country should put her to work.

I couldn't have said that better myself.

I am looking forward to the subsequent editorial they are publishing tomorrow about how Donald Trump is the worst candidate put forward by a major party in modern American history.

Tasty Trudeau

If Justin Trudeau joined the race for president right now, he'd win. (I truly believe the country would come together to pass a new law just for him so he could run as a non US citizen)...

Seth Meyers Takes a Closer Look at Trump's Birther Lies

All you need to know about the Trump Birther announcement:

Aleppo. or, a leppo.

While I tend to write about my fear of Trump on here, I just need to take a moment to discuss the fact that Gary Johnson does not know what/where Aleppo is. To all of you who are voting for him just because you "hate" Trump and Hillary, please, take a moment and watch Gary Johnson fumbling on a question about Aleppo.  He claims he "blanked." But see for yourself, I think it was a little more than a blank, especially when Aleppo is a major point in politics right now...

#LaueringTheBar

Last night, Matt Lauer sat down with Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump in a live, prime-time forum. As I sat watching the first half hour with Hillary Clinton, I saw how Matt started by asking about the "damn emails." I do not know how she keeps her cool, when for the millionth time, she is asked this question. But she does! I would have had a complete "Mad Megan" moment. (I rarely get mad, but when I do, it is a huge, blow out, screaming, swearing, crying mess, which in college, my friend Jess dubbed "Mad Megan.") I was texting a friend about this last night, how impressed I was with Hillary's ability to keep her cool, and how I would have lost my shit long ago. Her response? Don't run for president. I laughed, and said, no, I am the female Trump, but I realize my temper would impair me for the job of POTUS, unlike Trump, who seems to be fueled by his temper. Anyway, I digress. After Hillary answered (for the MILLIONTH TIME) Matt's question about the emails, he, and people in the audience asked Hillary questions. And I watched as Matt repeatedly interrupted her. At first, I thought he'll do that to Trump, too. Hillary finished answering questions (a few of them questions she has answered countless times already), they went to commercial, and then they came back with Trump, who was interrupted once during his entire segment. I was thrilled to see the hashtag Laueringthebar trending. I love the Today Show, but for what it is. Fluff. Reporters who don't really ask the hard questions, but I can get some news, thrown in between stories about puppies and Hoda Kotb helping people check items off their bucket lists. That is what I like about it. I know what I am getting when I watch it every morning: mindlessness. But when I sit down at 8pm to a serious forum with the presidential candidates, I am hoping for equality, tough questions, and fairness. I was sad to see Matt Lauer couldn't handle that. As I write this, Matt is interviewing Dana Carvey. Nothing against Dana, but Matt, let's stick with these kinds of interviews in the future, ok? (Also, I love Meredith Vieira, and I like to think if she was still on the show, she would have done the forum and kicked ass, but maybe not, maybe I just love her doing the job I've known her in).

Vox.com has a great compilation of some Tweets about Matt last night here.

Comic Relief today isn't really comic relief, just something that excites me greatly: the first page of the first episode of the Gilmore Girls reboot. It will be on Netflix November 25, 2 weeks after the election.

Above photo from Slate.

Don't be stupid

I continue to be baffled by "Bernie or Busters" who are refusing to vote for Hillary because they "hate" her or "don't trust" her. I recently asked a friend if Bernie hadn't run, and Hillary had got the nomination basically no contest over Martin O'Malley, would she still not be voting for her? I was answered with silence. I voted for Bernie. Bernie represents everything I believe in. But I am not going to not vote. Plus, I don't hate Hillary! Eight years ago, I was behind her in the primaries.  I was sad when she lost, but I whole heatedly got behind President Obama as soon as she conceded. I recently came across a great "letter" on Huffington Post to "Bernie or Bust-ers" you can read the whole thing here.
 
My favorite passage from it is this:

With all due respect, you’re beginning to sound like a bunch of petulant children who kick and scream whenever they don’t get everything they want. You’re the equivalent of the sandlot brat who whines “it’s my ball” and quits the game because he doesn’t like the way it’s being played or because he’s not winning. This is not behavior of revolutionaries. A revolution doesn’t happen overnight, which is why Sanders is pleading with you to continue the fight with him well beyond the convention and the election. Real revolutionaries fight to the death and put the cause before themselves. You’re not doing that. You’re making this all about you.

If you fail to show up for Hillary in November, and Trump wins, then your revolution will prove to be nothing more than a faddish exercise in futility by privileged white millennials who shamefully cut off their noses to spite their faces, while destroying everything that Sanders worked to achieve for you. Because President Trump will toss it all in the trash. The gains made on minimum wage, income inequality, free college, Wall Street/big banks, criminal injustice, the death penalty, Citizen’s United, climate change, super delegates and more will have been in vain. They’ll end up like sad bullet casings on the failed battleground of your ill-fought, prematurely ended revolution.

 If you fail to show up for Hillary in November, and Trump wins, then your revolution will prove to be nothing more than a faddish exercise in futility by privileged white millennials who shamefully cut off their noses to spite their faces, while destroying everything that Sanders worked to achieve for you. I want to shout that from the rooftops to every single person who voted for Bernie and is still refusing to support Hillary.

Guys, pull yourselves together. It's been over a month since Hillary won the nomination and we had such a kick ass convention. Let's do this.

Comic Relief: Dogs.

So there was a "shake up" in the Trump Campaign on Wednesday. And that makes me think oh no. Shake ups make me nervous. That means he realizes he is slipping, and needed a change.  I don't like change. I like how things are right now, and I'd like them to stay that way until November 8.

I follow a journalist, Jared Yates Sexton on Twitter, and have loved his tweets throughout this election. Apparently I am not alone. An article from The Good Men Project has all of Jared's tweets from Trump's rally last night in North Carolina.  You can read it here. I will warn you, it is terrifying. 

He points out how different Trump seems now, more controlled than he has been, and also has some observations on the people attending the rally.

This isn't the rambling, embarrassing Trump address we've seen for a year. This is focused and has a message for media to swallow.

— Jared Yates Sexton (@JYSexton) August 18, 2016

Guy behind me calling for Clinton to be thrown in prison, "and you know what happens in prison"

— Jared Yates Sexton (@JYSexton) August 18, 2016

Guy next to me says of Trump doesn't win he thinks we'll either have a civil war or the country will die.

— Jared Yates Sexton (@JYSexton) August 18, 2016

Listen. This was a different Trump product. A dangerous one. And his supporters are ready for violence.

— Jared Yates Sexton (@JYSexton) August 19, 2016

So, we shall see where it goes from here. I'm back to being completely nervous.

Your comic relief for the day: when you hate your job

Don't Hate on Hillary

To some of you Bernie or Bust people who are having a hard time getting on the Hillary train because you "don't trust" her or she's too "shrill", This is the article for you!  And, quite frankly, if RuPaul's endorsement of Hillary doesn't convince you, I don't know what will.

Great op-ed from the NY Times here, on Trump's 2nd Amendment comments.

I find myself getting teary eyed, getting heart palpitations, and barely able to look at FiveThirtyEight's latest prediction.  I was talking to a friend last night about this election, and she was saying how she didn't see how Trump could win. My first general election was in 2000, and I will forever have severe PTSD from that election. My thoughts then were how could anyone ever vote for George W Bush? Much like the thoughts many people have now how could anyone ever vote for Donald Trump? 16 years later, I am looking back fondly on the days of my loathing of George W Bush. I stopped being able to watch him speak when he was elected. I stopped being able to watch Trump speak in March. So, as I look at the latest prediction, I close my eyes, take a deep breath, see that it is possible. We may very well have our first woman president. And then 20 year old Megan quickly rears her head and says don't forget 2000. And I take another deep breath, stop getting too cocky, and remember there is a lot of work to do before November.

Instead of some comic relief, I give you some eye candy from our neighbors to the North.

Show me the Money!

The tax returns. Hillary Clinton and Tim Kaine have released theirs. Trump and Pence have not released theirs. And we are all thinking the same thing: Trump is hiding something. Is he not as rich as he boasts? Is a lot of his money in other countries? Does he not donate to any charities? All of the above? There are some great articles about this very topic, to get your wheels turning and give you some ammunition if/when you bump into a Trumpet (a friend of mine told me her mom refers to Trump supporters as Trumpets, so I have decided to steal that with glee).

Truthout.org
Fortune
NCRM

In the non tax return world of Donald Trump, I found this fascinating article about his tweets last night, showing how every non-hyperbolic tweet comes from his staff, and every hyperbolic tweet comes from him. If anything, this, to me, just further proves his instability. The author, David Robinson, is a data scientist and ends the article with this: "A lot has been written about Trump’s mental state. But I’d really rather get inside the head of this anonymous staffer, whose job is to imitate Trump’s unique cadence (“Very sad!”), or to put a positive spin on it, to millions of followers. Are they a true believer, or just a cog in a political machine, mixing whatever mainstream appeal they can into the @realDonaldTrump concoction? Like Tony Schwartz, will they one day regret their involvement?"   Part of me wants to feel bad for Trump's staff. But, if they are Trumpets themselves, I don't feel bad for them at all.

And your comic relief:

Pence and Abstinence

This morning, I came across this article about an interview of Mike Pence in 2002 by Wolf Blitzer.  I realize it is 14 years old, but something tells me that Mike Pence's views on birth control have not changed. I would like to extend an invitation to any woman who supports Trump/Pence to tell me how, in their 21st century minds, they can vote for someone who says things like that. I do not understand it.

Anywhere you look, you see that time and time again, studies have shown abstinence only education does not work. This study from 2007. Although my doctor always tells me not to look things up online, one of my favorite self-diagnosis websites, and one most Americans run to as soon as a new rash pops up, WebMD, agrees, too. The Advocates for Youth Organization says on their website "Abstinence-only education programs are not effective at delaying the initiation of sexual activity or in reducing teen pregnancy."  (click for full article).

On the other hand, here are some "cool" statistics for abstinence. Come on, kids, a whopping 3% of Americans wait to have sex until marriage. THREE. They are trying to tell people that is a large number. I hate to tell you, it's not. I think that encouraging people to wait to have sex until he/she is married, is also encouraging them to get married young. We live in a world where now, women especially, can go out and live their lives anyway they want to. We can go to college, we can go to grad school, we can run companies, we can start companies, we can run for president. And, we are living longer! When people started waiting for marriage to have sex, it was because they were getting married at 14, having babies, and dying before they turned 40. Now we are living into our 90s. There is no rush to get married and have babies. We don't even have to have babies any more! That's right, I said it here: women, listen up. Your life is still valid if you don't have kids. And you should be able to live your life, enjoying sex, even if you aren't married, even if you are and you don't want kids, without the worry of getting a disease or pregnant.

SO, I pose this question: if you support contraception, (I'm not even getting into a woman's right to choose, I am just talking about the basic principle of BIRTH CONTROL), HOW, can you vote for Trump/Pence?

Comic relief: Don't Use Our Song

Great post by Dan Rather on Trump's comments yesterday... 

Practicing my Amendment Rights

 Today, Donald Trump said this:

 

Yes. He suggested that "2nd amendment people" could do something about the threat that Hillary poses to their rights to own a gun. I think we all know here he wasn't suggesting they start their own campaigns on gun ownership. Just last night, I was talking to a friend about how Trump seemed to be "toning it down." And I said to her "yeah, he's done this before, and I always think, shit he's toning it down, so now it might get close again." And I keep thinking There's no way he'll say something stupid again. Until he does. And it seems like each time, it is more outrageous than the last. How is this guy a legitimate candidate for the President of the United States? The NY Times has a good article about the whole thing here. 

And now, a rant about guns:

I don't like guns. I don't like violence. I don't think that any average Joe American citizen has the right to own military caliber automatic weapons. Quite frankly, I also don't see the need for any American to have a hunting rifle either, unless that is how they get their food. But. Hunting is a "sport" so I understand that dream is a long shot, and that's ok. Because I believe we can all work together, we can all compromise to live in a safe country. I understand that gun control won't mean every single gun is gone. All I want is people who should not be able to buy a gun, to not be able to. All I want is it to not be possible to buy gun that can kill several people in seconds.  Let's ban assault rifles. You can keep your hunting guns (I won't even do the research to see what a single shot, tough to reload hunting gun is called because I don't want to educate myself on that). 

I would also like to hear the answer to the question I have had for a long time: if you claim you have a gun to keep yourself and your family "safe," but you also claim that you are a responsible gun owner and have them locked up in a closet, how are those guns keeping you safe? You are lying about something. You are either lying about them keeping you safe, and you just like guns, or you are lying about having them locked up. If, God forbid, something were to happen in your home, do you really think you will have enough time to run to your closet where your guns are locked up, tell the invader to just hold on a sec while you unlock it to get out your gun? So either your guns are laying out where your kid could get it and accidentally kill someone, or you just have the guns because you really really want to exercise that 2nd amendment right. 

So, pardon me, while I exercise my 21st Amendment right from now until November 8. *

*Disclaimer- I cannot take full credit for that 21st Amendment joke, I saw something similar on twitter and think it is brilliant

Non political smile of the day.

Woah. I started this blog 8 years ago when President Obama was running against John McCain. This blog has been quiet because things have been pretty damn good. I realize I could have kept it up, discussing things as they happened, but I haven't. And now, with an extremely scary candidate on the right, I pulled the blog up, and decided to start it again. I'm keeping the title, because I think it is still relevant today. This is just a quick intro to say I'M BACK! Share with your friends, follow me on twitter, and most importantly: VOTE!!!!!!